My Mother Was a “Boy Mom”. Here’s What That Meant For Me As Her Only Daughter.
The damaging (and damning) realities of being a woman raised by a “boy mom”.
In the 14 years before my birth, my mother was a boy mom. She had two sons and she raised them fiercely. Football games, band concerts. My mother did it all. Until she had a daughter…
I got less of my mother in terms of love, affection, and presence than my brothers did. Why? What made it so hard for my mother to show up for me the way she showed up for my brothers?
One or two band concerts, a single rugby game. The only investments my mother really made in me were in terms of my looks and my relationship with men. The majority of our time was spent screaming at one another, sitting silently in a room as negativity festered between us. I didn’t know who my mother was and she didn’t know who I was either. But she knew who her sons were and showed up for them no matter what.
For those who make the mistake of becoming this mother, their daughters stand as both competition and a deadly reminder. Spending their lives forever locked in resentment and competition, being the daughter of a boy mom is a curse that follows through the ebbs and flows of life.
