Q. How do parents deceive their children? (via Quora)

A. There are a number of ways that parents can deceive their children, and these can happen both consciously and subconsciously. Either way, however, they can create a major sense of conflict for our children (and major hardship later on down the road).

Perhaps the most corrosive way parents deceive their children happens around their emotions. Very often, our parents teach us that our emotions are something to be feared or avoided. Rather than teaching us to address our anger, grief, or sadness — they teach us to bury it and ignore it until it explodes in our faces.

In order for us to become happy, well-adjusted adults we have to learn effective ways in which to process these emotions and put them to bed before they become a bigger problem.

So, instead of teaching your children not to cry (because it’s an inconvenience to you), we have to seek instead to teach them to question their emotions. Why do they want to cry, and what could bring their tears to an end? Our emotions are only worthwhile when we look for the information they bring and the action they inspire in us.

Author | NLP-MP | I write about relationships, psychology, and growth. Founder @ The Dragr App. My new book — Relationship Renovator — is available now.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store